Starlight
by Pam-Panda
Summary: Billy and Teddy have broken up due to a fear Teddy has developed of Billy's powers. Billy falls into a depression and fear of himself once again, and slowly finds comfort in the one person he would have never expected. The God of Mischief himself, Loki.


The days seemed to be dragging on long and longer, no matter how hard he tried to move forward, it seemed that time might as well have stopped for Billy Kaplan. His brown eyes swollen and red, and his cheeks constantly stained with tears. He had just believed he got Teddy back after the events of the parasite passing, that they were over the idea that the only reason Teddy may have loved him could have been due to mind control, or even that he existed because of Billy's powers. Well, at least over it in a way that would let them stay together. He thought that kiss that gave him enough will, enough courage to defeat the parasite, that helped him become Demiurge no less, was them making-up. He thought that they were going to move forward.

Unfortunately for him, not long after these events, it had become apparent to Teddy that he was terrified of Billy's powers. That they just did not resonate well with him, and that maybe he couldn't love Billy if he was this scared of him. Teddy not only caused for his now ex-fiancé to shatter once but twice, for the same powers that nearly tore them apart before... This only made Billy feel more insecure about himself, just when he thought that everything about him was now okay. He hadn't even been talking to his parents about, he loved how much they tried to help but at the same time it seemed to just be in vain. So Billy sat alone, sobbing quietly and wallowing in his own depression that ate away at him from the inside out. The only real comfort he could find was through his music. Terrible when not even Game of Thrones, let alone Tyrion, couldn't make him feel better. This was pathetic, or at least he thought so. But maybe today he could practice his magic, maybe find some form of comfort in it.

"AllpossibleworldsAllpossibleworldsAllpossibleworlds." The boy said aloud to himself, sitting calming in his circle of candles. His swollen eyes slowly as he tried to clear his head, only opening the soft brown orbs once again to stare at the images before him. There was one that did catch his eye, however. In some world, somewhere, he saw himself laughing and smiling with another. It was not the reason that it was another with him, but WHO it was that made the young boy stop on that one world.

"No, no. That is enough for today," Billy spoke aloud to himself once again, running his fingers through his partially neat locks, "No more magic, no more powers. It will only keep causing problems… I have to go out. Yeah, I have to go out, Kate's party is coming up, right. I should go out to buy a new outfit for the party. A few new outfits. That should be fun, yeah?"

Anything to distract himself, anything to escape this heavy atmosphere he formed within his space. He wanted to move on, but his heart wasn't going to let go so easily, HE wasn't going to let go that easily. But, he did want to try. So he just pulled on a red shirt, zipping on a black zip-up hood over it, and slipping on a plain pair of jeans and white sneakers before making his way out. Once he hit the street, he realized that just maybe the weather felt as down as he did. It was like one of those real life movie moments where your whole setting matched however you felt on the inside. It may not have been raining, but it was dull and grey outside. His olive complexion that would normally glow when the sun hit it, was paler and made him look even deader than he felt. He didn't bother wondering why it felt like there were eyes on him, it wouldn't be anything new as he walked down the street, staring at his feet that made tiny little pats along the concrete.

But there were a pair of eyes on him that were much different than the rest. A pair he had not seen since the events wrapped up. These eyes were a beautiful shade of emerald green that held guilt behind them still, because these eyes belonged to the not-so-young God of Mischief himself. Loki Laufeyson, blending in with the crowd as he watched the one known as "Wiccan" move about in a manner that was so unlike him. He knew why, however, he knew why the young boy looked like a wandering ghost, and he knew that the Demiurge no longer felt comfortable with his own powers.Loki thought to himself that he must have seemed like a stalker, calmly following the boy through the crowded streets until he managed to get right behind him. The boy felt a chill up his spine as the God drew closer, and nearly hopped out of his shoes when a hand was placed on his shoulder.

"Hey! What the-? L… Loki? What are.. How did you..? What?" He wasn't even aware of what he was going to say, his mind having nearly been in a blank state for a long enough time, how was Billy suppose to react to the male who just disappeared on that day.

"It is nice to see you again as well, Billy." The other spoke softly as he gave a smile, removing his hand from the boy's shoulder and slipping it into his pocket.

At first, aside from seeing the man in general, it was odd that Loki was not in his normal cosplay-like get-up. He actually looked… Normal. A not too bad either, a green button down shirt and grey jean-bottoms, it really wasn't all that bad. No, wait, Billy should be focusing on other things right now.

"Loki! You're here! I thought you were gone, I mean—" Billy was trying to find the words to express his shock, to ask for answers of the questions he couldn't ask.

Loki silenced the boy however, placing one of his fingers over the boy's lips, he simply continued to smile with his head shaking. "If you can forgive me for stating the obvious, it appears you haven't been well, Billy." Seeing the expression on Billy's face become a little more devastated than it already was, Loki automatically regretted his words as he pulled his hand away, adverting his eyes to the ground as he continued, "I would also like to apologize for my previous actions, the events that happened. As well as… being such a terrible friend to you. It feels almost as if I am to blame."

_Why am I not surprised…? _Billy thought to himself as he listened to the man in front of him. Of course he knew, he always seemed to know everything, and these were the moments Billy couldn't care HOW he could have possibly known. What he cared about was the fact Loki was apologizing. Was this a trick? Some kind of ruse to maybe brainwash the broken boy? Or was he being sincere?

"Now I will not be surprised if you do not believe me," He was still going, looking in the boy's general direction yet never actually focusing his eyes back on him, "After all the things that have happened in the past. But I really do mean what I say. And I also mean it when I tell you that… Well, I feel I should not leave you alone."

"Why do you care, Loki? Is there more you want to get from me? I am not that dumb to be tricked by you anymore. I mean, you just DISAPPEARED then. You just left. And now you come back, somehow knowing all that is happening with me, and you want to APOLOGIZE? You want to BE THERE for me? If you are not lying, why in the world would you do something like this, huh?" Billy quickly cut the God off, staring at him with a frown that seemed to wrong for his face, just like every other time it would paint itself as part of his expressions.

"Because I…!" Loki tried to defend himself, knowing full well that this boy had no real reason to trust him now, but he wanted to try still, "Because you need someone, Billy. You are scared all over again, you're alone. I don't… I can't express that… I just don't want you to feel such a way." His voice was calm, he did not allow himself to get worked up as it would defeat the purpose of what he was trying to do. Why did this feel so out of character? Yet at the same time it felt so right to do as he looked into the brown orbs that were staring back at him, "Billy. If there would be any time that you could trust me, it would be now. Look into my eyes and tell me I am lying to you. I just… Want to help you, truly I do."

He really wasn't lying, as strange as it felt and not knowing what he could possibly expect as a benefit for him in the long run, he could see how Billy's accusations were slowly ceasing. How his expression softened from bitter and confused back to a more somber and fragile. Gods. Someone as beautiful as him should not look so upset, they should not feel so scared of themselves. At least Loki didn't think they should, and when the other finally sighed in what may have been some form of defeat, the only other think Loki received was Billy nudging his head back to the direction he was headed in before.

Neither of them paid attention to the name of the store Billy made his way into, but there were a few things Loki noticed. They were sort of those dumb things you'd find someone paying attention to in some kind of romance novel. He noticed the way Billy tried not to hunch over as he stood or walked, the way he'd quickly wipe his feet on the rugs so that his sneakers wouldn't squeak on the tile floor. Even as they looked through clothes in silence, the way Billy would put things back where he found them or would carefully inspect any details that would catch his eye.

"Hey… Uh… Could you help me pick a few things out?" Billy broke the silence in a hushed tone, not looking up at the other male as he flipped through more of the rack with a defeated expression, "I mean, I'd just like another opinion, normally Teddy helps me out with these things… and, uh…"

Damn, he did it again.

"Hey, you don't have to explain anything." Loki reassured the boy before any tension could settle back in, "I'd be glad to assist you in picking out new clothes, it should be… Fun?"

If anything, that response made an awkward little chuckle escape from Billy's lips, followed by a smile cracking across his face long enough to make it feel like Loki's heart was going to have a miniature explosion. That was cute, really cute. It disappointed him when the boy went back to a blank, unfeeling expression as he carried the armful of clothes he picked out for himself to the changing rooms. Loki, having snapped out of his little trance, followed quickly behind. Planting himself in a seat right outside of it, waiting on the other to come out.

Billy stood in the center of the changing room, having already taken off his hood and shirt, he was simply staring at his reflection. Though not very prominent, he was noticing old scars he never even thought he would have. They small little marks, scattered all over his torso, but they were still there and blended in perfectly with him after their healing. Usually this would be some deep and meaningful moment of how he was suppose to realize that his heart would heal, and that it would be alright with the scar because it showed he survived it. But that wasn't what was happening, he was drawing mental blanks, the only things setting him back to his right mind were the sighs that escaped. Looking at all the shirts he picked out, he decided he would try on a grey t-shirt with a red button up open over it.

He twisted his mouth, making a face that showed he wasn't sure if he liked this look, if it was too out of character for him to wear. He decided maybe it would look better if he switched into one of the pants he picked out, a nice pair of black denims that he easily slipped his shoes through. It was… He had no idea, slowly he peeked his head out the door to see Loki sitting there, waiting on him to come out with his first look to give an opinion on. Clearing his throat, Billy was lightly biting his lower lip as he felt nervous in this moment. Loki turned his head to the male's direction, he eyes going from a bored expression to that of delight.

"So, uh… how do I look?" Billy asked as he looked to the ground, shifting around awkwardly.

"Hm… I like it! Simplicity looks good on you!" Loki held his chin as he spoke, it was a normal but relatively attractive gesture for his new body, and he managed to get another chuckle from Billy when he gave the boy a thumbs-up.

Billy's smiled stayed this time, however, even as he went back into the room to try on different arrays of outfits he picked out for everyday wear. Though his last one, he didn't exactly intend for it to be for everyday. This one was supposed to be for Kate's party, as well as New Years, after all a two-in-one wasn't exactly a bad thing. He even tried to tidy up his hair a bit before he slipped out a simple black button-down shirt with a pair of jeans that seemed to be a faded blue. This would be nice, right? Walking back out, he seemed to at least have a little more pep in his step, everything from earlier not even crossing his mind. He was just having a nice time being out of his home and doing something nice for himself. Loki was enjoying it too, to see Billy's face becoming it's normal bright expression again was one of the best things that could happen to him.

"What about this one? I was thinking of wearing this one to Kate's birthday party." Holding out his arms and spinning around so his "judge" could get different details, Billy stopped in his tracks when he saw the strangely-intense look on Loki's face.

"Well, I like it, but it is missing something." Loki spoke slowly as he got up from his seat, grasping a bit of the fabric in between his index finger and thumb, "But we can fix that up. Over all it is… Perfect."

With the last word, his emerald orbs looked up to meet the brown ones staring back down at him. Releasing the cloth, Loki gave Billy a quick pat on his shoulder before planting himself back in his seat, following up with asking in the most polite way he could, "Are we done?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, let me change back and-." Billy was speaking so fast that he cut himself off before darting back into the room.

That was a little embarrassing, or maybe Billy's dorky side was just coming back out. It was obvious he seemed in a rush to get back into his normal clothes since his original clothes looked rather… sloppily placed back on his body. "Just got pay for these!" The boy continued with his arm full of clothes, going over to the nearest cashier he could find. But he was stopped mid-step when Loki grabbed onto his shoulder again. The taller male leaned down, flashing what looked to be a credit card in his other hand as he arched a brow upward. Having the younger one set the clothes down onto the counter, he continued to look at Billy even when handing the register lady the little plastic square. Fixing Billy's disheveled hair when he carefully combed his fingers through it, it was just as soft as the last time he felt it…

"I will handle these for you, Kaplan." Loki winked as everything was rung up, leaving Billy with an expression that made it obvious how dumbfounded he was at this situation.

Now that he thought about it, he was pretty dumbfounded about everything today. All he wanted to do was get out and have a change of pace, and even though this was not what he expected it is what he got. Even as he thanked the lady that bagged his clothes, he tried to get all of his thoughts together. Still walking with the Mischievous God that insisted on staying by his side, his mind was now starting to conflict in a variety of emotions. That content feeling that just started to arise again, and the poisonous emotions that he bathed in earlier. Taking in a deep breath, he let out a loud sigh that Loki couldn't help but make note of. It was a quiet walk again, but not as awkward as it was earlier. Biting his lower lip once he made it back to his home, Billy stared to the man next to him and partially held up the plastic bags.

"Th-thanks, Loki. You didn't have to do this for me."

"I know I didn't. I wanted to, after all." Loki smirked before bowing his head down, "But next time we enjoy each other company, you're treating."

"Next time…?" Billy asked curiously, his eyes widening in what could have been shock-again- at that comment, watching Loki turn on his heel to begin walking away.

"You've got my number. Call me whenever you'd like. Until then, Billy!" Loki spoke in a more of an up-beat voice, only briefly glancing over to see the his face one last time until their next meeting.

_Next time…_ Billy thought to himself, hugging his items in one arm and the other frozen on the doorknob. He felt his heart tighten, it wasn't letting go of any past feelings. Not yet. However, just maybe he can slowly let go. If he lets himself. Even if the comfort is Loki, just maybe he could…

"Heh. Yeah. I'll call him for next time." Billy smiled to himself, opening the door to walk back into his home, life slowly coming back to his now glistening chocolate orbs.


End file.
